Thanks Rahul : at least you said something :)

In the Mahabharata, Prince Uttara was the son of Virat, the ruler of the Matsya kingdom. Upon the prodding of the Kauravas, the King Susarma of neighboring Trigartadesa attacked Matsya, leading King Virata to take his entire army to the south. Meanwhile, the main Hastinapura army, with warriors such as Bhishma and Drona attacked Matsya from the north. When the news of the invasion by Hastinapura reached the capital of Matsya, there was no army there, just the young prince Uttara surrounded by the ladies of the palace.

Too embarrassed to be seen as chicken,  prince Uttara roared that he would go out alone and defeat the Hastinapura army single-handedly. The ladies of the royal palace doted upon the young warrior in delight. However, as Uttara rode out to the battlefield and far away from the palace, the reality of his situation began to dawn on him. In panic, he got off his chariot and began to run away.

You probably understand why I am telling you this story. Except in the Mahabharata, Uttara was lucky enough to have Arjuna himself as his charioteer, disguised as the eunuch Brihannala. Young Rahul’s chariot driven by Burqa Dutt not so much 🙂

A few days ago, Rahul Gandhi got carried away and declared that he would bring an earthquake upon us. The “ladies” of Lutyens squealed in delight at their dimpled young savior. Any time now, Rahul would ride into battle and bring the big bad Modi down, thus winning back his birthright. And with Rahul getting his birthright, the jackals of Lutyens would be back to getting scraps from the high table. Some would be able to get back into the Prime Minister’s plane, some would get their cushy positions back at universities and various other boards and panels formed purely for the purpose of channelling money and rewards into the pockets of loyalists.

But as the shehzada rode closer and closer to the battlefront, his courage began to fade away. He wanted to run, but the earthquake line was too much. And as he jumped from his chariot and began to run away, his charioteers in the mainstream media started running after him, laughing at his cowardice. Even the ladies back at the palace were beginning to mock him. This was too much.

And so it was that Rahul Gandhi had to bring on the “earthquake”. Congratulations Rahul for at least trying to fight. I didn’t think you had it in you.

In the Mahabharata, the charioteer Brihannala stands up and does all the fighting while Uttara watches. But what are your options, Shehzade? In the Mahabharata, the soldiers of Hastinapura were struck with terror as the heard from a distance the twang of Arjun’s Gandiva bow. Where is your Gandiva, Rahul? And who is supposed to hold it and use it for you?

Instead of a shower of arrows from the Gandiva, y0u have thrown at the PM some rotting scraps of stale “information” already in public domain and already discarded by the Supreme Court. In fact, the courts were furious with Prashant Bhushan for showing up with such nonsense. So stinging was the rebuke  from the courts that an irritated Bhushan came back that night and started throwing muck at NITI Aayog Chairman Bibek Debroy’s academic record from 3 decades ago. There was no connection between Bibek Debroy  and what happened in the court that day. But Bhushan came back and was tweeting about how Bibek Debroy’s thesis advisor had criticized his work in the 1980s…  Imagine how frustrated Bhushan was that night. He had to take his anger out on somebody…anybody.

You have made a mistake Rahul. You have attacked your enemy at his strongest point. Never do that. At this point in time, Narendra Modi’s credibility is sky high. No one thinks he is corrupt. No one. Why would Modi take money? For what? For who? And what will he do with the money…lol! Instead the right way to attack is to go around the enemy’s strongest point, searching for weaknesses and attacking there. That’s how you chip away at an enemy. You could have attacked smaller ministers who are not well known to the public and tried to bring out scams there. A good example in this regard was the recent hitjob on Kiren Rijiju by the Economic Times. That was the right way. Look up the lesser known faces in the BJP, investigate their business interests, invent some “cousins” if needed and make claims of corruption in those. They might stick. And once you have 5-6 ministers caught in scandal, you have a chance …just a chance of making a bid for the credibility of the big man at the top.

Instead you went straight for the big man. You wanted to captain the Indian Test side without ever playing club cricket. In your defense, you were handed the job by virtue of birth. You didn’t earn it. And that’s what happens when you have unearned privilege. You make stupid decisions.

Instead of bringing down Modi’s credibility, you have now given him an excuse to go back to talking about Congress scams. Public memory is short … and to quote an article from Firstpost, “BJP crying scams is getting old”. And that was becoming a handicap for BJP. Guess what? Now that you have raked up the issue, Modi has an excuse. He can bring back the talk of your scams at the very same time as he is fighting the biggest ever battle against black money. You are welcome.